WHEN THE NARUTO CREW GET STUCK IN A FAIRY KINGDOM!
by monicaxMANDOKUSEE
Summary: Oh you know this is going to be funny. Gay Akatsuki. Teen Waterballoon fights. Getting trapped in a fairy kingdom. Oh hell yeah. XD
1. Chapter 1

**WELCOME TO…**

"**WHEN THE NARUTO CREW GO TO A FAIRY KINGDOM!"**

**LMAOOO!**

**I was like laughing myself while writing this!**

**Yeh meh it actually isn't that funny.**

**It's my own psychotic tendencies to be a complete douche bag. C:**

**HOPE YOU LIKE ITTTTT:D**

**Xx!**

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"I'm a fairy! Flying High! Not a care in the world! WOOOOOOOOooooooOOOOOO. I am flying so very high. I'm touching the sky. My hearts a flutter When I tried these new chips COATED WITH BUTTTERRRRR! OOOHHH!!! How wonderful life is! When I am flying high So very high when I can touch the SKYYY!!" sang Deidara in his sleep.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP DEIDARA!!" Roared Hidan throwing a book at him.

Deidara got startled and woke up.

"A MAN CAN DREAM CAN'T HE!" Deidara roared back.

"You don't have to act so GAY about it! You fucking poof," Hidan replied.

"But Imagine Hidan! Living in a fairy kingdom! yeah!" said Deidara folding his hands and placing them on his heart, his eyes sparkling with happiness.

"Ha ,Ha, Ha!! I swear you are sooooooo gay!" Said Hidan leaving the room.

"Hmph! Hidan never listens to me! Just imagine living in a fairy kingdom! Yeah!"

Deidara left the room, walking like a gay men, miss prissy style, with back straight a straight left arm and a left hand that was bent horizontally. [Think legally blonde when she's walking the dog yeah?

Deidara walked into the kitchen of the Akatsuki lair.

"Itachi!" he shrieked girly-ly.

"What?" Itachi replied in the same girly tone.

"Hidan is like so being mean! yeah. He thinks dreaming of being in a fairy kingdom is like so like gay like yeah like yeah!"

"Oh my god Like Hell No! He is like so gay Like yeah!"

While Itachi and Deidara had their little…er…gay man conversation Somewhere over on the other side of Konoha some teenage boys and girls were having conversations of there own!

"I wanna break up with you,"

"B-But Charles I-"

Er…Sorry wrong conversations.

"Sasuke this has been your smartest idea ever!" said Shikamaru laughing.

Sasuke kept typing sleazy pick up lines to his 'babe friend' on MSNOK. [MSNOKMULTI SOCIALIZING NETWORK OF KONOHA.

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: So babe what are you wearing? ;**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-bomb says: Nothing babe ; How about you?**_

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: Well I am wearing boxers, a singlet and a jacket:D**_

"No you dick head! You're supposed to say 'nothing' too!" said Naruto punching Sasuke in the arm.

All the boys were at Sasuke's house tonight for a sleep over.

Meanwhile at Sakura's house…

"Oh my god Sakura! These boys are so clueless! Man what a good idea! And you even disguised your MSNOK name to like a stripper! HAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Ino in stitches.

"I know! They are so hooked!" giggled Hinata.

Sakura laughed while picking up a hand full of red lollies out of a big white bowl.

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: A Jacket aye? I might have to rip that off you. ;**_

"Oh my god dude! You are so in!" said Neji jumping up and down.

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: Oh really? ;**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: Yes, I want to lick you ALL OVER!**_

"Fuck dude she's getting sexual! Take the offer!" said Shino snorting.

"Okay Okay Hang on!"

"HAHAHAHHA! Sakura You're a classic!" laughed Hinata.

"Who agrees this is the best sleep over ever!" said Ten Ten standing up and yelling.

"Me!"

"Oh I do!'

"Most definitely!"

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: Lick me eh? You'll have to catch me first! ;**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: Oh Gosh. You're such a character!**_

"You fuck wit! You dick! You lost the sexual-ness! I hope your happy!" said Shikamaru annoyed.

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: So what do you want to do?**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: What do you want to do babe? ;**_

"Oh shit! She's being sexual again! Hurry KEEP THE FLAME OF SEXUAL YOUTH BURNING!!" shouted out Lee.

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: Well, right about now, I want to PISS LIKE A RACEHORSE! Man That Pepsi went straight through me!**_

"Sakura he really is clueless!" Twitched Ino.

"And to think we used to like that!" added on Sakura.

"Oh the joys of moving on and being 15!"

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: Oh babe you're so sexy you make me wanna scream!**_

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: I make a lot of people scream. It's my tendency to pick my nose then eat it, but hey I guess you can't help everything!**_

"Oh...My...God.." said Neji's mouth dropping open.

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO SEXUAL?!" shrieked Chouji.

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: I guess you weren't the guy I thought you were. :'[**_

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: Oh Don't cry baby! Papa will make it all better! ;D**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: Oh really! When can we meet!**_

"I can't believe he hasn't figured out it's us! We should so print it out and send copies around the school!" laughed Ino.

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke says: How about tonight?? At Konoha Park?**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb says: Oh My God! That's sounds fantastic babe. I'll meet you there at 11:30pm! Where you're most sexiest clothes! We're getting down and dirty!**_

_**Sexy-Slutty-Cherry-Bomb has logged off.**_

_**Emo-Child-Sasuke has logged off.**_

"Oh My God Sakura! We need to get you ready! He'll know it's you! Did you think for one second about what you were going to wear?!" questioned Ino.

"Hmm, how about we all go, and we'll bring water bombs and water guns with us! And then spray them and taunt them! MWUHUHUHUHUHHHH!!" Laughed Hinata evilly.

Ino twitched slightly

Same with Ten Ten and Sakura.

"But no seriously that is a good idea!" said Ino calming down.

"Well we only like an hour! HURRYY LETS GOOO!!" said Sakura.

Meanwhile at the Akatsuki lair…

"And He was all Like Omg You're a fucking poof and I was like oh my god like yeah!"

"Oh my god, I would have like so like SLAPPED HIM like oh my god like!"

"I like know Itachi Like friggen HELL!" said Deidara in a bitchy high school girl tone.

"Why don't we like show him what we're made of! We'll get to fairy kingdom! And who'll be laughing when we can wear GOLD G-STRINGS!"

"OMG YEAH ITACHI!"

And they walked off happily holding hands.

At Sakura's House…

"Where is the shaving cream Sakura?" questioned Ino.

"Check my bathroom cabinet,"

"Sakura where is the honey?" asked Hinata

"Check the kitchen,"

"Sakura where is the custard?"

"Check the fridge Ten Ten,"

"I can't wait to see there faces when we show up!"

"That's right! Hinata bring the camera!"

Hinata walked over to Sakura's desk and picked up the camera.

"Is it charged?" said Sakura tying a balloon up.

"Yes," she replied.

They had about three hundred balloons all filled with random stuff. Some with Honey, Shaving Cream, Water, Custard and Mud. They also had a water gun only filled with water though.

"Alright girls. Ready?" asked Sakura cocking the gun Charlies Angels style.

At Sasuke's……….

"Okay Sasuke! Where this!" said Shikamaru throwing him a leather stripper police out fit.

"Oh and try this!" said Neji throwing something behind the door.

"Dude why don't I just go in my underwear? It'll be easier to rip off?"

"How about," said Neji standing on Sasuke's bed.

"WE ALL GO IN OUR UNDERWEAR!" he continued compassionately.

"YES!" they all said in unison.

So all the boys stripped down to their underwear and left the house.

"Come On Sakura catch up!"

"Dude it's hard to walk in stilettos and fish nets!"

At the last minute they thought it'd be funny to just dress Sakura's legs up. So they made her were pink fishnets and black vinyl stiletto's. Oh they had a good plan.

The girls set up behind a large tree that hid them all and waited for the boys to come.

"Chouji Catch up!" said Sasuke running in his underwear.

Lee was running cupping his …erm…'man bits' with his hands.

They all ran out and stood in the middle of the green field.

"Where do you think she is?" asked Sasuke hugging himself to keep warm.

They all did the same.

"Hey what's that over there!" said Neji pointing to the tree the girls where hiding behind.

"It-it looks like a leg!" said Chouji.

Sakura placed one of her legs out of the edge of the tree, to, in Ino's words, 'seduce the fuck heads'.

"Man I can't believe you got me to do this!" Sakura whispered clutching of the branches so the boys wouldn't see the rest of her.

"You're the only one here with perfect legs!" remarked Hinata.

"Grr," mumbled Sakura.

"Dude maybe we should go closer," they said swaying to the movement of the leg.

"Yes, yes we should," said Sasuke enlaced in seductive glory.

As the boys walked closer Ino planned out the attack.

"Okay when on my count girls,"

"So pretty, and nice and sexy,"

"One,"

"I want to touch it!"

"Two"

"She smells like cherries!"

"Three!"

"YAAAATTTTTAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**-SSPPPPLLLAAASSHHH!!-**

**-FLASHHH!-**

"Take that! HAHAHAA!" said Ino throwing 2 water balloons at a time.

Hinata was snapping all these photo's on the camera then stopped taking them and disappeared.

"And that too!" said Ten Ten.

"And This!" said Sakura spraying them with the water gun.

"AND HOW ABOUT THIS!" said Hinata reappearing behind Sasuke and dumping a water balloon with honey on his head.

As the water -balloon-throwing and picture-taking saga continued.

Two gay men walked past the park, walking there little miniature sized dogs.

"Well I say they are having a lot of fun!"

"Yes, shall we join them!"

"Definitely,"

So these two mysterious men, one being a fish and one being a plant stripped off there clothing to only be in there white underwear.

The teenagers stopped and looked at the two men who were now throwing around a heap of custard and mud everywhere, then resumed to their fighting positions.

"OH EW IT'S IN MY EYE!" Complained Lee.

"I guess this is what they meant by 'Down and Dirty'!" said Sasuke guarding himself with his arms.

"Ha Ha! Man You guys got so sucked in!" said Ino throwing a water balloon at Shikamaru's face.

"Man No need to mess with our feelings!" said Neji holding his…er… 'man bits'.

Then, Sasuke nodded at Naruto and then Naruto Nodded at Chouji until they all nodded and agreed at something.

The girls stopped throwing the hundreds of water balloons they had.

The boys charged at the girls yelling stealing all the water balloons off them.

It was a slippery, sticky, gooey mess of a fight.

All battling for the balloons.

Ino bit Shikamaru's arm.

"AGHH!! You bitch!" wailed Shikamaru.

Sakura pulled Sasuke's hair.

"OH THE HAIR OH MY GOD THE HAIR!!"

Hinata dug her nails into Neji's arms.

"OW THE SKIN THE FUCKING SKIN!"

And Ten Ten Slapped Lee across the face.

"OW MY YOUTHFUL, YOUTHFUL FACE!"

"Oh what the heck!" said one of the gay men.

And then the two gay men made slippery, sticky, gooey, gay lesbian man sex.

While those…erm...lovely events were occurring some unknown people were lurking in the shadows.

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**THAT'S IT FOR THE FIRST CHAPTER!**

**HOPE YOU LIKED ITT!!**

**R&R?**

**LOVE YOU ALLLLL!!!**

**Xx!**


	2. Chapter 2

**HELLO!**

**2****nd**** chapter!!**

**HOPE YOU LIKED THE FIRST ONE!**

**This one isn't that funny.**

**Because it's more informative and serious-ish.**

**But any who. I promise the next chapters are going to FUNNY AS HELL. **

**Stay tuned.**

**Oh and if you are a reader of "Shoot from the hip and Aim for the head"**

**I will be rapping it up, very soon. SO IT WILL BE COMPLETED! And I can start a new fan fic!**

**So if you have any ideas for a fan fic you would like me to write PLEASE PREACH PEOPLES!**

**Write it in your reviews or email me, the addy is in my profile.**

**THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS.**

**Well the whole TWO reviews I got. BAHAHA that's promising. XD**

**HOPE YOU LIKE IT!**

**Xx!**

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"OKAY! OKAY! YOU GIRLS HAVE PROVED YOUR POINT!" pleaded Sasuke.

"YOU WIN!!" he shouted.

The girls stopped and looked at each other.

"WOOOO!!"

They all jumped up and down chanting happily.

"That just proves how perverted you guys actually are!" Said Ten Ten in a snotty manner.

"Sexy Slutty Cherry Bomb? How dumb can you get!" questioned Ino laughing.

The boys feeling rather hurt walked away from the park leaving the screaming girls that were in laughing hysterics alone.

"Well I guess that's the end of that!" said one of the gay dog walking men.

"Yes, yes it is!" said the other.

So they stood up and put their clothes on, then walked away.

"Ha Ha! Girls I reckon we should go back to Sakura's it's getting late!"

"Yes I think we should!" said Hinata not containing her laughter.

While the girls walked off another presence followed them home.

"Gaara, Gaara? You there?" said a voice through a walkie talky.

"Yes, yes! What do you want Temari!"

"What have you planned?" replied the voice back.

"I'll get the girls, you and Kankorou get the men, tomorrow morning is when we'll leave. Operation starts now,,"

With that the mysterious red head zipped off to Sakura's house.

He walked down the street, hoping to get there before the girls did.

He was a different being. The one's Deidara dreamed about.

That's right.

You guessed it.

A FAIRY!

He walked through the door., literally through it! Like a ghost.

And he awaited the girls in Sakura's bed room.

He heard the front door open.

"Ha-ha! You should have seen Shikamaru's face man! It was Like "WHAT THE FUCK!" HAHAHAHAA!" laughed one of them.

The girls walked up stairs still laughing and cheering about their defeat.

Sakura opened the door but didn't take notice of the man until all the other girls went quiet.

Sakura also stared.

"AGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" they all screamed running out of the room and closing the door behind them. They put their backs to the door as well.

"Who the fuck was that!" shouted Ino.

"I-I dunno! Was it a burglar?" asked Hinata panicking.

"A rapist more like it! You saw those eyes!" said Sakura petrified.

"M-Maybe it was a, a murderer!" said Ten Ten on the verge of tears.

All the girls got up and hugged each other, crying in fear.

"I DON'T WANNA DIE! WHO WILL CARRY ON BEAUTY!" wailed Ino.

"WHO IS GONNA PISS THE BOYS OFF?!" cried Ten Ten.

"WHO IS GONNA BE THE ONE TO CARRY ON PINK HAIR?!?" howled Sakura.

"WHO IS GONNA BE THE HEIR TO THE HYUUGA CLAN!?" everyone stopped crying and looked at Hinata.

"What it's important," she said scratching the back of her head.

Then they all continued crying again.

Suddenly Sakura's door re-opened.

"Are you whiney little girls gonna get back in here so I can explain what I am doing here?"

The girls stopped and looked at him.

"Meh sure why not,"

"I don't see the harm in that,"

So the girls walked into the room so Gaara could explain himself.

Meanwhile at Sasuke's………

"I feel so used!" said Sasuke kicking stuff around.

"We should have known!" groaned Chouji opening a pack of potato chips.

"Well that's women for ya!" said Shikamaru's throwing himself onto a bean bag.

"We should so get them back," said Rock lee sitting down.

All the boys still had honey and an array of other stuff dripping off them.

They sat in sad silence for 5 whole minutes.

"I'm with Lee on this one,"

Everyone looked at Neji.

"I know I know, hard to believe, but we should get them back! Think of all the cruel stuff they've done to us in the past leading up to tonight!"

They all thought.

"Well there was the frogs and worms in our sleeping bags at camp in year 4," said Naruto.

"And the time they threw rotten eggs at us!" said Chouji.

"And the time they filled our WHOLE room with crumpled newspaper!" added on Lee.

"Or the time they re-adjusted the door knob so the locking part was outside, and then they locked us in and they only fed us apple skins and milk!" shouted Shikamaru.

"Or the time they locked us outside when it -25 degrees! And not to mention we were wet!" mentioned Kiba.

"Or the time they rung up our mums and pretended to be our pregnant girlfriends, man I got grounded for a year!" whined Shikamaru.

"Anyone remember the time they singed us up for knitting at school?"

"Yeah! Or the time we got suspended for the graffiti they did!" shouted Kiba.

"Not to mention when they stole our clothes after we went to the hot springs!" 

"And the water balloons just then!"

"THAT'S IT!" said Neji.

"We're getting them back big time!" said Naruto.

"Let's devise a plan!"

While the boys were plotting two familiar figures were outside there window.

"Come on Kankorou you fat oath!" shouted a girl.

"I'm trying, stupid bitch," the boy seemed to mutter the last bit,

"WHAT WAS THAT?!" she shrieked.

"Nothing, Geez!"

"Hmph!"

Temari lifted her head to see what was going on.

She then hid.

"What is it?" asked Kankorou.

"Oh my god, they're gorgeous!" she yelled happily.

"Just hurry the fuck up, we need to grab them and be on our way,"

"Okay, Okay!"

Temari slipped through the window, as all the boys had their backs facing it.

She fell with a loud thud.

"What was that?" asked Naruto in a soft tone.

All the boys turned around to see a tall blonde haired girl dusting herself off and muttering swear words.

They all gasped.

She looked up.

"Uhm, Hello?" she said awkwardly.

They just stared, wide eyed.

"Who is she?" asked Neji.

"I dunno," replied Sasuke.

"Uhm, I'm Temari. I come to you from the land of, I mean from, uhm the hidden village of sand, yes that's right, the hidden village of sand,"

"Why are you here?" asked Sasuke inching away.

"I need you…," the girl tried to count them "Well how many ever there are of you, to come with me,"

"Why?"

"Just do it!"

"Girls and their hormones," mumbled Kiba.

"Okay fine we'll come just let us put some clothes on!" yelled Sasuke.

"Fine By 6:00 in the morning we're leaving," said Temari sitting on the bed.

"Fine Geez!" moaned Naruto.

The boys hurriedly got cleaned up and ready.

"But guys it's only 4:46 in the morning! We have PLENTY OF TIME!"

"No we don't," said another voice.

"Who was that?"

"It was me!" said Kankorou hauling himself through the window.

"W-Who is that?!" exclaimed Shino.

"He's my little brother, he's helping me,"

"Hurry up! We're leaving in les than an hour!"

Meanwhile at Sakura's…

"I still don't see why!" said Ten Ten pulling on her navy skinny jeans.

"And I don't see why he has to stand there while we have to get dressed!" hissed Hinata.

"I think he's pretty cute!" whispered Sakura.

As the girls got ready Gaara spoke again.

"We're leaving in 5 minutes, Hurry,"

He girls dropped a heap of random necessities in their hand bags and awaited Gaara's instructions.

"How do we exit here?" he asked.

"Down here," replied Sakura.

The girls walked down the stairs and Gaara followed.

They strolled out of the front door and into the outside air.

"Okay they should be here in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1," said Gaara counting down.

A tall blonde haired girl, a boy with a black hoodie and the boys that were in the previous water fight appeared in front of them mysteriously.

"Okay hey the hell did they do that?!" shouted Shikamaru.

"Shut up!" snapped Temari.

"Just wake up the whole fucking neighbourhood!" she continued.

"Wait you never said anything about THEM being here!" yelled Sasuke.

"Oh shut up! You're just pissed cos we won!" sneered Ino.

Sasuke muttered a string of swear words.

"Everyone ready?"

"For what exactly?" asked Hinata.

Gaara, Temari and Kankorou sighed.

"We Just EXAPLAINED!" they said at the same time.

Hinata then shut up.

"Okay, I'll get it,"

Temari stuck her hand in he pocket to get "It".

She had a blue zipper.

"Oh My god!" exclaimed Sasuke.

"What?" said Temari annoyed.

"I watched this on Dave The Barbarian the other day! Oh MY GOD! You're going to take us somewhere by opening a portal in id air with the zipper! Am I right! I so am! Cos I am fantastic and you can't beat fantastic so NYAAHHH!" he said poking out his tongue.

"You're right! You are the most fantastic being I have ever met Here have a pill and shut the fuck up!" said Temari sarcastically.

She pulled the sipper down in mid air, and Sasuke was right (for once in his life), and a portal did appear!

"Okay who's the first?" asked Temari with her hand on her hip.

"We like so are!" said two voices running up the street.

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**WOOP WOOP HOPE YOU LIKED IT!**

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**Xx!**


	3. Chapter 3

**3rdd chapterrrr!**

**It shall be mildly hilarious.**

**This fic is lonely and needs love so PLEASEE tell your friends on fan fic to readd itttt. **

**Thanks.**

**Xx!**

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The teenagers looked up the street to see, a blonde haired man and a raven haired man running up the street towards them, holding large suitcases.

"Who,"

"The Fuck,"

"Is that!" said Sakura finishing off Sasuke's and Shikamaru's words.

The three mysterious people looked as well.

"SO like is this an express like way to FAIRY LAND!" said Deidara making spirit fingers in a circle around his face.

"Yes," said Gaara sighing.

"Can we like come?!" said the raven haired man.

"I don't see the harm-"

"NO!" exclaimed Sasuke.

"Why not?" asked Sakura.

"if you haven't noticed," said Sasuke.

"This fuck wit, is my brother!" he said pointing to Itachi.

"Yeah, like so?" said Itachi filing his nails.

"So, YOU AIN'T COMING!" argued Sasuke.

"Watch like me!" and with that Itachi and Deidara held hands and jumped in the portal.

"WeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEeeee!!" is all you could hear as it faded away.

"Well I guess, hop in?" said Kankorou.

They all nodded and jumped in after each other.

_**-flash backy thing, or flash forward? Or maybe there all on a high?-**_

**The lyrics to "Cos the candy man can,"**

"**Oh cos the Candy man can cos he mixes It with love and makes the world taste GOOOODDD. The candy man can cos he mixes it with love and makes the world taste GOOOOD.**

**Breaks into Christina Aguilera's Candy Man.**

"**I met him out for dinner on a Friday night! He really got me working up an appetite! He has tattoo's up and down his arms, there's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm! He's my one stop shop, with a real big UGH -orgasmnoiseorgasmnoise- SWEET CHOCOLATE SUGAR COATED CANDY MAN!!"**

**-END-**

"Agh!"

"Eek!"

"Ow!"

"Ugh!"

They all landed with a crash all other and on top of each other. [as bad as that sounds

Sakura opened her eye's.

She was amazed, she couldn't help but gawk at the sight of her.

"THIS IS THE FUCKING RAMEN SHOP!" she huffed, all red in the face.

"Itadiktimasu!" said Naruto gulping down a rather abnormally large bowl of ramen.

"Oh Hee, Hee, my bad," said Gaara opening the zip again.

They all hopped in again.

**-flash forward back high thingomajigo. OKAY WHO THE FUCK CARES!-**

**You know we can be together. Under my, under my Umbrella ELLA ELLA AYE AYE AYE UNDER MY UMBRELLA! YOU CAN RUN INTO MY ARMS IT'S OKAY DON'T BE ALARMED COME INTO ME! THERE'S NO DISTANCE IN BETWEEN US! SO COME ON LET THE RAIN POOR!**

**BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM I WANT YOU IN MY ROOM! LETS SPEND THE NIGHT TOGETHER TOGETHER IN MY ROOM!**

**-FIN-**

"Ow MY LIKE HAIR!"

"Agh I broke like a nail!"

"Can you two shut the fuck up!"

"Uhm…," said Shikamaru pointing behind everyone.

"What is it Shikamaru?"

He tried screaming. Nothing would come out.

They all turned around.

"AGHHHHHHH!!" They all screamed as they came face to face with a T-REX DINOSAURR!.

They all ran away from this 30 metre tall, sharp teethed and pointed clawed beast.

"Gaara the zip!" screamed Temari.

Gaara opened the zip in mid air while running and everyone jumped in.

**-I THINK GAARA IS A CUTIE AGREE OR DIE-**

**WHERE DID YOU COME FROM BABY! YOU JUST CAME AROUND! YOU SEXY THING!**

**I BELIVE IN MIRACLES! WHERE YOU FROM! YOU SEXAY THING YOU SEXAY THING YOU!**

**YOU! I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR! I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR! I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR! GAY BAR! GAY BAR!**

**-END-**

All of them arrive and landed with a thud.

"Please say we're here," said Ino rubbing her head.

"We're here," said Gaara smiling.

"Is this it?" asked Ten Ten looking around at the small clearing they landed in, it was like a moderately sized circle of dirt, then it was surrounded by tree's.

"No," said Temari, she pulled back a banana tree leaf.

"This is it,"

"Wow"

"Ooh"

"Ah"

"Like Omg!" [now we all know who said that -cough- Deidara -cough-

"It's amazing!" squealed Ino.

Before them was a land full of castles, rainbows and prettyfulness. And everything seemed to be draped in diamonds, pixie powder and sunshine dust.

"Now Now Children, don't lose your heads, don't get over excited just stay perfectly calm," said a voice.

They all turned around.

"Willy Wonka! What the fuck are you doing here?" asked Sasuke.

"Oh wait, isn't this the Chocolate And Candy Lovers Convention?"

"No!" they all shouted in unison.

"My mistake," he said walking off.

"Geez the nerve of some people," said Kankorou scoffing down a large block of Wonka chocolate.

"Come on kids, we have a mission," said Temari riding a large butterfly.

"How does she do that!" questioned Hinata in amazement.

"I want one!" squealed Neji.

Everyone jumped on their own butterfly.

Apart from Chouji, he needed an EXTRA EXTRA large butterfly.

"Giddy up horsey weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, neigh!" sing songed Sasuke steering the butterfly..

"Please, shut the fuck up," said Gaara.

They were flying high above Fairy Land. Deidara and Itachi couldn't help but squeal like little girls after getting a new Barbie doll.

They landed outside a magnificent castle that was a calming blue colour, it was draped in flowers and seemed to sparkle in the light.

"We're here," announced Temari jumping off her butterfly.

The rest did the same.

They walked into the massive castle that seemed to be the size of Konoha!

"Hurry up, your majesty awaits,"

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**WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPP!!!**

**R&R?**

**xx**


	4. Chapter 4

**4****th**** CHAPPYY!!**

**ENJOY ENJOY**

**:D**

**Thanks for the reviews.**

**Tell your friends to read this if they get a giggle out of gay men and fairies :D**

**Xx!**

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"Wow!"

"Ooh!"

"Aah!" they exclaimed as they saw wonderful pretty sites upon walking in the castle.

There were magnificent, detailed paintings, painted vases, flowers EVERYWERE!, glitters was sprinkled over everything, wonderfully dressed servants were standing still awaiting orders, there were doors on every side of the hall, millions of doors as far as the eye could see, then in front of them was thrones made of gold draped with gossamer and sparkly stuff.

Then the King and Queen sitting in the thrones, eating sparkly fruit and drinking shiny wine.

"Welcome to Gaytopia, where happiness is our bidding," said the King.

"This sounds like my like so sort of like PLACE!" squealed Deidara to Itachi.

The queen glared at them.

"I'm sure you've been told your missions by now,"

"Yes," the teenagers said in unison.

"I will refresh your minds a bit," said the queen keeping her composure.

She stood up and walked gracefully in front of the group.

"As these three may have told you, my children need to be wed, as the King and myself are getting old, you teenagers are here to fulfil that task, you have to prove to us, and most importantly our son and daughter that you can be there spouse. This is almost a competition to win hearts. And it starts now, Bring my dear children out," said the queen smiling demurely.

The queen was draped in a deep blue and gold dress, a very Victorian style and it was covered in sparkles.

The servants escorted a beautiful girl and a ABSOLUTELY HOT FINE PIECE OF ASS! Of a guy in front of the teenagers.

The servant then brought out small pedestals and the guy and girl stood on them showing them selves off.

While Sakura, Ino Ten Ten and Hinata were drooling over the guy.

The teenage, testosterone filled boys were drooling over the BARBIE DOLL LOOK ALIKE in front of them.

The girl was dressed in a pink silk miniskirt that was frilly, she also had a glittery bikini and a pink puffy jacket on top of that with her name studded in Diamonds on the back "Crystal" is what it read. She also had her blonde hair puffed up in curls. Crystal had black fishnets and hot pink stiletto's on also. She stood there chewing gum and twirling her hair.

[Oh just a pointer! this is what a guy looks like at my school , he's a male model as well, so I based it on him. . He doesn't have the tattoo's though. And I based on what he looks like in this story to one of his model photo's. Are you girls jealous that I go to school with a guy that looks like this? XD Oh and further on in the story as you read, you realize he's a total egotistical prick, but he's really really nice irl. :D The HOT PIECE OF ASS! On the other hand was wearing a blue sarong, to leave his toned torso and tanned body on show. He also wore a Egyptian looking collar. His fringe was shaggy over his eyes and his hair covered his ears. He had "Vanity" tattooed in curse writing below his belly button and his name "Xavier" tattooed on his for arm.

"Is this what we have to choose from? They're rather peasant looking don't ya think?" said the girl waving her freshly manicured hand around.

"Yes the girls are rather, how do I put this nicely, unsightly compared to you, and well you're rather hideous Crystal," the boy said cockily.

The girl punched her brother in the arm.

"Well we better get this over with," said Xavier, drearily.

"Now go children, go explore our kingdom," said the Queen.

Itachi and Deidara got out there camera's and tourist equipment and ran out of the castle ready to explore "Gaytopia".

The girls followed Xavier as he strided out of the castle.

Ino was the first to make a move on him.

"Hi! My name's Ino, you can call me Hotty 101," she said fluttering her eyelashes.

Xavier sighed.

"You're too perfect it makes you ugly," said Xavier.

Ino stopped in her tracks twitching angrily as Xavier walked off.

"SO PERFECT IT MAKES ME UGLY! WHY I OUGHTA!" Ino punched the air angrily as Shikamaru held her back.

"Mandokusee," he sighed.

The teenage boys followed crystal outside the castle as they started slipping on their own drool.

"Ow!"

"Oi!"

They all exclaimed.

They exited the doors into the fairy land that waited for them.

There were market stalls, massive flowers shading the area, small fairy houses, and everything had the "hand-crafted" touch.

"This is beautiful!" exclaimed Sakura, amazed by the place, well the other girls were amazed by something else…

-cough- FINE PIECE OF ASS! -cough-

"He's so fucking hot!" exclaimed Hinata.

"I know! Man I'd tap that shit sideways!" said Ten Ten drooling.

Xavier strutted down the street, making woman weak at the knees.

Something made Sakura think he didn't get out of the castle much because of the attention he received.

Crystal on the other hand, made her mark known, she signed autographs, took photo's with the little girls and made it clear who she was and how beautiful she was.

"So what do you guys want to do?" said Xavier turning around.

"Do? Well I want to do YOU! of course!" exclaimed Ten Ten.

Xavier raised his eyebrow.

"Well that is the most disturbing thing I've heard in the past 5 minutes,"

"Xavier Darling, why don't we let them go of and explore, I mean there here for a while, we can go check up on them and socialize with them later," explained Crystal to her older brother.

"Sounds like a good idea," replied Xavier in a smooth tone.

"Well we're out," said Crystal, chewing her gum.

"Aight," said Shikamaru waving them off.

Sakura walked up next to Shikamaru.

"I don't get you Shika, you were in love with that stripper we made up over MSNOK, but you don't seem to take an interest in Crystal, I mean she's perfectly beautiful, she's skinnier than Ino! I mean she's gorgeous!" said Sakura.

"I like my woman more fuller. I like woman with some weight on them, like you Sakura, in my eye's you have a perfect body, not saying your fat! But I reckon you're just right, I reckon Xavier should choose you," said Shikamaru smiling.

"Why thank you Shika! Ahah. Xavier is too vain, he's just, I don't know how to explain it, he's just to superficial and up himself," spat Sakura.

"To you girls he's probably a heathen god," laughed Shika.

"Gods, are beautiful to say the least, but they have perfect qualities, and one of them is being a kind hearted person," replied Sakura.

"Who knows, maybe he's mean because it's his 'image', just break the ice with him, talk to him a bit, but I don't like him," said Shikamaru.

"Okay, I'll take your advice,"

"Well now that's settled, I'm gonna go off to find a 'real woman'. Bye Cherry-Bomb!" laughed Shika as he walked off.

Sakura couldn't help but laugh to at the new name she had.

"Sakura!" called Ino in that tone of hers.

Ino walked up to Sakura.

"SO what do you think of Xavier?"

"He's, er, the hottest thing alive?" said Sakura.

"I know!! Isn't he the hottest!!! Omg! I want a piece of that!"

"Uhm, didn't he turn you, just get rejected by him less than 10 minutes ago?" said Sakura plainly.

INO WAS FURIOUS.

"I'LL have you know Sakura, he just was a bit intimidated by me! So he was telling em to erm, ah…"

"Fuck off but in a nice way?" said Sakura in a bitchy tone.

Ino huffed.

"I'll show you! I'll show you all!" said Ino running off crying.

"Thank god she's gone," said Sakura rubbing her temples.

"Oh My god Itachi! What the fuck are you thinking!"

"What like the fuck are like on about Deidara?"

"That like fucking retched blue colour does not match your skin!"

"Fuck you Deidara you have no style!"

"Oh come the like fuck on Itachi who wears socks with their sandals!"

"All gay men do it hoe!" shouted Itachi.

"Oh that's it bitch!" Just Deidara was about to bitch slap Itachi, Itachi grabbed his hand softly.

"Let's not fight, Deidara, I love you to much,"

"I love you more Itachi!" Said Deidara caressing his hair their face inches apart.

"Let's go like make man love?" questioned Itachi.

"Oh you like bet!" said Deidara.

So they were, er, up to stuff.

Meanwhile something LURKED IN THE SHADOWS -violin shriek-

Just think of a pedophile.

Has it come to mind yet?

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**HOPE YOU LIIKED IT!!**

**:D**

**R&R?**

**Xx!**


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